


One for The Collection

by oceantovre



Series: Criminal Tendencies [1]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Angst, Crime, Crime AU, Death Threats, Kidnapping, M/M, Threats of Violence, just read it please these tags are bad, kind of, murder boyfriends
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-09
Updated: 2018-09-09
Packaged: 2019-07-10 08:45:47
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,243
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15945845
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/oceantovre/pseuds/oceantovre
Summary: Sugawara Koushi was expecting it to be a bad day, but he didn’t expect two attractive, homicidal men to track him down into an alley and press a knife to his neck.





	One for The Collection

**Author's Note:**

> This is not like anything else I’ve ever written, and I’m kind of okay with it? It’s definitely different from most fan fiction on here, and not really what I was expecting out of myself, but here it is. This is going to be a series, so don’t be mad at the kind-of cliffhanger.

Sugawara Koushi, affectionately called Suga by his friends and co-workers, had known that today was going to be an absolute mess. He’d woken up late, then his landlord had called to say he was late paying rent, then he had to wait ten minutes in order to get a cab to get to the hospital where he works, then he signed in late because obviously  _ he was, _ and then his boss had talked to him about  _ upkeeping his work  _ because it was  _ dropping in quality _ , and then finally Suga had been forced to walk home because there were no cabs in sight, and honestly he wasn’t in the mood to trouble himself with public transportation. 

And that was how he found himself here, walking the streets of Tokyo alone, pondering on what he could do to fix his work ethic. He thought it was fine, really, and the problem was more likely the three new nurses who operated under him and hadn’t  _ quite  _ settled in yet. To be honest, he wasn’t even entirely sure of their names yet. Suga made a mental note to look on his roster of subordinates to figure out who the  _ fuck  _ these people were messing up his hard work, which was a surprising thought for him, considering he usually held a moderate temperament and a patient personality. 

It was precisely these mental distractions that stopped him from noticing the two men who had been walking behind him for several blocks, waiting. One of them was taller than the other, though both were wearing crisp black suits, and both were unfathomably attractive. The other big difference was that one preferred a knife, which they had tucked in their sleeve, and the other was partial to guns, of which he had two in his waistband. 

Suga, of course, was oblivious to this, as his mental cacophony was drowning out the sounds of matched footsteps. He wasn’t aware that the men were waiting for him to pass by the alley between a tattoo shop and an abandoned building mainly used for getting high. The alley was, in a way, the perfect place for danger. 

Another block, and the shorter of the two men went into action. Transforming his character entirely, he broke into a slight jog towards Suga, molding his voice into something desperate and real. 

“Sir! Sir!” The man yelled, and Suga turned to receive the man. The taller of the two used this opportunity to stay behind Suga, and slip into the alley that the poor nurse’s back was now facing. 

“Can I help you?” Suga asked, wary of strange men in suits, as all logical people should be. Suga himself was in a pair of light blue scrubs, a standard look that he had grown sick of over the expanse of his career. 

“Yes, sir, please,” the shorter said. “I appear to have lost my dog when I let him out a moment ago, and I have a dinner I simply cannot be late to! I think he ran around here, but if you had a moment, would you mind helping me search?” 

Suga visibly released a breath, thankful that this didn’t seem to be too much of a hinderance upon him. After all, all he had planned was bad TV and shitty beer until he eventually passed out on his couch. Life was unforgiving to him. “Of course, have you checked in the alley?” 

As the nurse turned to look in the alley, the shorter man could barely contain his glee. Every single of of them, every one, they always without fail suggested that the alley should be searched first. And then, really, they were doomed. 

By the time the shorter man caught up to Suga in the alley, the taller had already taken it upon himself to knock the nurse unconscious, and Suga lay slumped against the wall of the alley. 

“Good work,” the taller said. 

“It was necessary, though tedious,” the shorter replied. “Emotions seem so disgusting.” 

“Ah, but you love me, don’t you Keiji?” the taller asked, and the shorter, called Akaashi Keiji by the government, Akaashi by those who knew him, and Keiji by those who loved him, scrunched his nose. 

“I suppose I do, Tooru,” Akaashi said, to the man named Oikawa Tooru, Oikawa, and Tooru respective to the prior descriptions. 

It was around this time when Suga woke up, his hazel eyes blinking open to the sight of the two men above him. Instantly, the panic. He scrambled around, as if trying to escape to the side, but it became clear very quickly that this alley had been moved specifically so that this was impossible. Resigned, he looked back up at the two men, pleading with his eyes. 

“Don’t look at us like that, little lamb,” Oikawa said, his face curling into something between disgust and pity. 

“This isn’t personal,” Akaashi added, shifting his arm slightly so that his knife, six inches and sharp, fell into his hand. 

“Business is business,” Oikawa nodded, as if agreeing. 

“W-wait,” Suga said, holding his hands up in front of him as if that would  _ really  _ block the knife from going through his heart. “P-please, no, I-I won’t tell anyone, just p-please, don’t.” 

It was odd, how his life being threatened renewed a vigorous bout of self-appreciation that had been absent in his self-pity previous to this experience. 

“Unfortunately,” Akaashi said, squatting down and bypassing Suga’s hands in order to gently place his blade just under Suga’s chin. “That isn’t how this game works.” 

The feeling of cold metal under his chin terrified Suga, who burst into a vicious round of sobs, with massive tears flowing down his face and his chest heaving massively. Akaashi paused at this, unnerved by the display of fear. 

“Aw, look what you’ve done, Keiji,” Oikawa chided cheerily. “You’ve made the lamb cry.” 

“I hate it when they do that,” Akaashi muttered, wrinkling his face in distaste and resuming a standing position next to Oikawa. 

“P-please,” Suga pleaded again, since the first time had gone so well. 

Oikawa ignored the words, instead studying Suga’s face, his silver hair, hazel eyes, the mole under his eye, the curve of his lips, the smooth expanse of his neck. Then, his body, and the smallness of his chest, his fairly wide hips for a man, strong thighs, and slim ankles and wrists. Suga was, in Oikawa’s opinion, quite beautiful. 

And there was Oikawa’s only fault; he enjoyed collecting beautiful things. That was why he had a partner beside him at the moment, and for a moment his mind flashed to the idea of having a third. Or, at the very least, a more organic addition to his collection of beautiful things. Currently, he had paintings, vases, plates, jewelry, sculptures, jewels, and toys galore, but nothing living anymore. Akashi had passed beyond being part of the collection. 

“He is quite beautiful,” Oikawa mused aloud, attempting to clue Akaashi in to his idea. 

“That he is,” Akaashi replied, then his eyebrows raised a fraction of an inch. “You would want to collect him?” 

Oikawa tilted his head to the side, still studying Suga. 

“Perhaps,” he said. “And then, at least, there’s no body to deal with tonight.” 

At the sound of the word  _ body _ , Suga was sent into another sobbing fit, this time having the brilliant idea to add some yelling into it, so that perhaps someone would find him and help him escape from his turmoil. 

Annoyed, but still oddly ensnared by the nurse’s looks, Oikawa knelt down quickly and placed two fingers into Suga’s mouth, using the pads of them to press down on the nurse’s tongue, and using his thumb under Suga’s chin to press a little. 

Suga was instantly silenced, though tears still spilled down his red, puffy face. Oikawa moved in closer, their faces now just inches apart. 

“How does that sound for you, lamb?” Oikawa asked, leaning and raising his eyebrows at the same time. He carefully removed his fingers from Suga’s mouth, though kept a grip on his chin. 

“Koushi,” Suga said, on instinct. “M-my name is Koushi.” 

An instant later, he felt new hands in his hair, gripping at his locks and tilting his head back. Akaashi stares down at him, eyes cold and hands tight.

“He didn’t ask your name,” he spat. 

Suga gulped, and due to his position, he was sure that Oikawa noticed it. 

“Though it is interesting, because we were not sent to kill a Koushi,” Akaashi conceded, turning to Oikawa. 

“That is peculiar, Keiji. You seem to have mistaken his identity,” Oikawa said, his voice a bit cold.

“I apologize,” Akaashi said quickly, the first break in his stoic facade since his act. “I’ll see fit that I pay for that. He still hasn’t answered.” 

The two men in suits turned back to Suga, whose eyes were wider than saucers, and fear was apparent on all of his delicate features. 

“I f-forgot the question.” 

“I asked,” Oikawa asked. “How it sounded?” 

“I-I don’t understand,” Suga responded, scared as the grip in his hair tighter. 

“Of course,” Oikawa said, as if this was obvious. “I haven’t explained.” 

Suga watched the men’s faces carefully, but there was nothing to see. 

“I suppose, really, you have two options. You can either be collected or disposed,” Oikawa hummed. “Seeing as you aren’t our initial target, I do feel it would be a shame if you chose to be disposed of.” 

Suga’s mind was running so fast that he could barely understand what he was supposed to be answering.  _ Collected _ or  _ disposed _ .  _ Collected  _ certainly sounded bad, though seemed like a much better option once he juxtaposed it with  _ disposed _ . Either way, he knew he was screwed, but at the same time he found himself oddly enamored by the men in front of him. 

They were both gorgeous, and conducted themselves with a level of civility that he wouldn’t usually suspect from people who appeared to be sent to murder. The man called Keiji was classically gorgeous, and Suga’s rampantly homosexual heart was having a hard time coping with that.  _ Yes _ , the man had a knife and  _ sure _ , it was pointed at Suga, but he was also stoic, and gorgeous, and had piercing steel blue eyes. 

The other one, Tooru, was more of what the few gay friends that Suga had would call a pretty boy. Chocolate hair, and pretty eyes, but he seemed to have more emotions than Keiji. He studied Suga carefully, in a way that both terrified and excited the nurse. 

All in all, Suga wasn’t entirely upset by the idea of being  _ collected _ by these men. After all, Suga was displeased by his job, he hadn’t had a boyfriend in years, and his life had pretty much hit the deadest end possible. He was terrified, yes, but he would be lying if he said he wasn’t slightly excited by the prospect. 

“Well?” Oikawa asked, his thumb in Suga’s chin tightening slightly. The nurse averted his eyes, unable to think clearly when he was being surveyed so sincerely by the men. 

“I don’t- I don’t know,” Suga responded, his mind screaming  _ danger  _ but at the same time telling him to just conceded to  _ capture _ , whatever that really meant. 

He felt a pressure under his chin, cold and metal, and expected the knife to be pressed back, but instead was horrified to see that the man called Tooru was holding a small handgun, the barrel pointed straight up through Suga’s skull. 

The nurse gasped, letting out another sob as his lips quivered. His eyes burned from having shed so many tears, and his head was pounding with a headache. 

“It’s time to choose, lamb,” Oikawa said. “Would you like to be collected or disposed? There’s no time for you to be unsure.” 

Suga brought his eyes back to the two of them, meeting them only for a second before averting them again. 

“C-collected,” he said tentatively. “Please.” 

In an instant, he felt the metal remove itself from his chin, and in another moment, the gun was replaced back wherever it had come from. When he blinked again, the two men were standing over him. 

“Good choice, lamb,” Oikawa said, looking down gently at the latest addition to his collection. “Grab your things, now, we must get going.” 

Suga kept his eyes on the men as he reached down to grab his bag, which was his only belonging, and stood up in front of them. He found that his ankle was hurting, and his scalp burned from where it had been grabbed, his head pounded, and his chin was sore, but otherwise, he was doing alright. 

He stood for a moment, unsure of what came next. 

“Come along,” Akaashi said. “It’s dangerous here at night. We wouldn’t want our lamb getting hurt.” 

The irony was palpable, but Suga tentatively walked to join the two men. They took up station on either side of him, ushering him forward and out of the alley. 

“I expect,” Oikawa said, leaning forward to speak right into Suga’s ear. “That you will not run. Really, it’s easier for everybody if you come quietly.” 

And, oddly, as they walked up the streets, and down back alleys, and through tunnels and ditches and all sorts of insavorable places, Suga didn’t think about running once. Perhaps, he had resigned himself to his fate. Or, more likely, he was curious to see where this would go. 

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! Please leave comments because I’m curious about how people will like this or not!  
> (Lowkey based Oikawa and Akaashi off of Mr. Croup and Mr. Vandemar from Neil Gaiman’s Neverwhere)


End file.
